Cunning Linguist: A Bad Boy Billionaire Romance Read online

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  Description

  Dedication

  Also By Naughty Angel Publishing

  Dirty Lil’ Angels

  A Note From Alexis

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  A Special Treat from the Author

  DILF

  Dirty Daddy

  12 Inches

  Python

  Cindersmellya

  Mr. President

  Cunning Linguist

  A Bad Boy Billionaire Romance

  By Alexis Angel

  Copyright 2017 by Naughty Angel Publishing

  All rights reserved

  This is a work of fiction. All names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or persons is entirely coincidental. This work is intended for adults only.

  Join the Alexis Angel Newsletter to get more steamy goodness!

  Description

  I love the title of this story because its so apt.

  It was so much fun to write but also talks a lot about my underlying philosophy lol.

  I think there are some hidden meanings and things in here with a deeper message amidst all the over the top unrealistic fun.

  I wonder though if it’s maybe too serious now?

  Nah.

  Enjoy.

  Dedication

  To Cheryl Maddox

  Also By Naughty Angel Publishing

  Alexis Angel

  Single TV Dad

  Sevensome

  Head Hunter

  Blessed

  Offense & Defense

  Princely Passions

  Lust Muscle

  The Biggest Licker

  Cindersmellya

  100 Days

  24 Inches

  Stories From The 6 Train

  Mr. President

  Dirty Daddy

  D.I.L.F.

  12 Inches

  Python

  Wicked Lil’ Brat

  Red & Blue

  Jailbait

  Abby Angel

  Hit & Run

  Boxers & Briefs

  Profit & Lace

  Mergers & Acquisitions

  Woman of the House

  Men of the House

  Dark Angel

  Murder/Love

  Hostile Work Environment

  B.I.L.F.

  Dr. Single Dad

  Two Beasts

  Buyer’s Market

  Gambling For the Virgin

  The Virgin Market

  Dirty Lil’ Angels

  Hi ladies!

  If you’re like me, once you finish, you’re not going to want the story to end!

  To receive exclusive sneak peeks, (before anyone else!), bonus content not seen anywhere else, giveaways, and tons more swag, visit me and my Naughty Angels on Facebook at Dirty Lil’ Angels.

  We’ll make it worth your while…

  :)

  Kisses!

  Alexis

  A Note From Alexis

  Well hello there, ladies!

  Let me first begin by introducing myself. My name is Alexis Angel. I write steamy contemporary romance. Steamy is another word, I guess, for dirty. And dirty is another word for fun! In fact, the dirtier the better because at heart I’m just a bad girl looking to have some fun.

  Having fun is why I do this. And, I’m just having fun in the next few hundred pages, doing what I do with a wink and a nod. It’s supposed to bring out some emotions and give you a chance to forget about your cares for a little bit. That’s all I’m looking to do.

  Some people want realism in their books. I say reality is too depressing. So you might see certain things as over the top or ridiculous in terms of never being realistically possible. Yeah, I agree. You’re coming into the world of Alexis by turning the page. Into a world where you have twin stepbrother quarterbacks with 12 inch…uhmm…appendages…that fall in love with their stepsister, where you have dragons who shift into billionaire BDSM rock stars, and so on. Anyways, I think reality should take a second place to fun.

  So I just wanted to say that, in case you know, you were hoping for like super real. The men and women in the pages below represent the best, and worst, of all of us as a collective whole. This is all about leaving your cares for the world behind, as we hold hands, and just for a little while go on a journey that makes us smile. And hopefully a lil’ wetter than before.

  Kisses!

  Alexis xoxox

  Chapter 1

  Jake

  “So, Mia,” I say, flashing my famous panty-melting grin that I know gets all of the girls wet, “tell me a little more about your orgasms.”

  “Jake!” Mia gasps as if my question shocks her, biting her lower lip as her cheeks redden.

  That’s how a lot of women respond when they first come on my show. But by the end of the segment, I guarantee Mia’s cheeks won’t be red from embarrassment anymore. They’ll be flushed bright pink with straight up ecstasy as she comes—really fucking hard—screaming my name the entire time.

  Whoa, wait, you say? What kind of show is this, you ask? Let me tell you. But I can’t promise I won’t make you a wet, horny mess by the time I’m finished, and you’ll be thanking me for it.

  So, yeah, allow me to introduce myself. I’m Jake Kent, host of the hit late-night talk show A Cunning Linguist. It’s the most watched cable show in the history of late-night television. With a name like A Cunning Linguist, you can only imagine why.

  But just in case your imagination fails you, allow me to enlighten you. Let’s go back a couple years. Back to when I wrote a book by the same name. My book about expert sex techniques and pleasing women in bed was an international bestseller. Insanely successful. I’m talking Fifty Shades levels of flying off the shelves, virtual and print. Because every fucking woman in the entire world wanted to give her man the ultimate guidebook for going down on her.

  Yeah, what can I say? I’m a fucking genius. What woman wouldn’t want a book about a good pussy licking? I bet just reading those words are making you wet right now. Am I right?

  Wink.

  So anyway, after this book broke all the records, the obvious next step was a talk show. But this isn’t just any talk show. Not even close.

  Because I’ve taken my desire to help people have satisfying sex to the next level. Instead of telling them how to do it, I show them. Yep. You read that right. Every single night, my show is filmed and broadcast live. And every single night I go down on the featured guest and give her the most mind-blowing orgasm of her life.

  I’ve made my fortune as the Cunning Linguist. I can have any woman I want. And I do. On the regular. I’ve heard there are some
billionaires out there who might not like so many women throwing themselves at them because of their financial status. Me? I couldn’t fucking care less. You know why? Because I know why the women are really after me. They want my magic tongue. And I’m more than happy to give it to them.

  The world fucking needs more orgasms. And not just any old orgasm. Not the kind that barely makes your pussy clench, the kind that only has a hint of a tingle behind it.

  Fuck no.

  What this world needs is the eyes-rolling-back-in-the-head, brain-short-circuiting, make-you-cum-until-you-can’t-fucking-breathe kind of orgasms. And I’m happy to be of service.

  Every woman deserves that. So that’s why I’m here right now with Mia, her blush just starting to fade as I stare earnestly into her eyes.

  “It’s okay, Mia,” I assure her. “That’s why you’re here. You’re not alone. Isn’t that right ladies?”

  I turn my megawatt grin on the audience full of women, hitting them with the full force of my raw sex appeal. I can practically smell the pheromones as their panties get even wetter than I know they already are.

  Cheers and hoots come from the crowd. Damn right that’s why they’re here. They want to see this for themselves. I wouldn’t be surprised if they all come at once while watching me eat Mia out here in a few minutes.

  And this episode tonight? It’s going to be one of a kind. The audience doesn’t know it yet—nobody does except Mia, me, and the crew—but the entire encounter is going to be filmed tonight. Typically the camera gets a shot of me moving in, then pans up to the woman I’m pleasuring, capturing the pure bliss on her face as I give her the orgasm of her life. But lately people have been questioning the show. I’ve seen it all over Twitter. People suggesting that the guests are faking it, that I’m not actually going down on them, that the live audience is paid off to say that I am.

  What a load of bullshit. My record is fucking unbroken. Not once have I ever gone down on a woman and come up anything less than victorious. The fact that these fuckers want to mess with my reputation and question my credibility pisses me off like nothing else. So we’re going to shut them up once and for all.

  Tonight the audience all across the country will see it all live on TV.

  Cutting my gaze away from the audience of horny, simpering, panting women, I glance around the set. This studio is fucking awesome. It doesn’t look anything like your typical talk show set. Yeah, we have a couple of cushy chairs, but everything else screams sex—the black and gray studio walls with bright pink accents, and the muted lighting that gives off a dark and mysterious vibe. It’s sleek, modern, and sexy as fuck. It’s my kingdom, and I’m about to make sure everyone knows I’m still the king of muff diving.

  “So these orgasms—” I begin again, but Mia cuts me off with a snort.

  “If that’s what you can call them.”

  I smirk. Now we’re getting somewhere. “Go on…”

  “They’re so boring, so routine, so...mediocre,” she says, seeming to forget her earlier embarrassment as her irritation with her less than stellar sex life takes over. “I mean, I never thought I could be bored with sex. But, Jake,” her eyes widen as if she’s horrified, “I am.”

  I cluck my tongue sympathetically. My tongue that is about to get busy. “Mia, I hate to hear that. Because if anyone should be having fantastic orgasms, it’s you.”

  I give her a knowing smile. See, Mia here runs a blog where she chronicles her exploits. I did my research—or rather, my protégé Toby did it and gave me the rundown—and Mia’s adventures on her blog have gotten worse by the week.

  “I don’t know, Jake,” she says miserably. “Maybe I’m just past my prime. Maybe the best sex of my life is behind me.”

  At this, I lean forward and grip her knees, squeezing gently. She gasps and bites her lip again, and I smile wider.

  “That’s total fucking bullshit, Mia. You’re in your mid-thirties. You’re just now hitting your prime for fuck’s sake. Don’t let anyone tell you differently.” I look out at the audience, making sure my face shows just how earnestly I feel about this. “Every woman, no matter what her age, deserves to come really fucking hard as much and as often as she’d like.”

  “I’m losing interest in dating, to be honest,” Mia continues with a sigh, but her knees have fallen apart just slightly, and I haven’t moved my hands away. “I even want to get married someday. But I need to know if it’s me. I need you to restore my faith, Jake. I need to know that orgasms can happen for me.”

  “Mia,” I say, pitching my voice low and meeting her eyes as I let my fingers drift a little higher on her thighs. Her muscles twitch and her breath comes faster, and I know for a fact it’s not her. So I tell her. “You’ve just been sleeping with the wrong men. Tell me, what do you like? Do you like it slow? Fast? Do you like it hard?”

  Mia swallows, her eyes clouding with lust. “I like it slow at first.” Her hands drift to her throat involuntarily and her lips part as her breath hitches. “Then I like it a little faster. Maybe a little harder.”

  “Maybe?” I give her a wink and slide my hands even higher, not even needing to push her legs apart because they’re just falling open for me.

  A strangled moan escapes her lips. “Definitely harder.”

  I chuckle. “That’s what I thought.” I brush my thumbs along her inner thighs. “What else Mia? What do you want?”

  Her eyes close and her head falls back, and I take the opportunity to sink to my knees in front of her chair. The audience goes a little crazy, the energy in the studio thrumming through me, just like the blood that’s now pulsing through my own body making my cock hard and throbbing.

  Fuck, at times like this I really want to just wrap my hand around my thick shaft and make myself feel as good as the women I pleasure. But I don’t. I never do. This is about them, and I’m not a selfish bastard when it comes to sex. I’m a giver. I give and give and give. And then I give some more.

  The heat from Mia’s pussy is practically radiating out like a blazing fire, and I haven’t even touched her yet, despite the fact that she’s now pushing her hips forward, already lost in the moment, trying to make contact. I love that Mia agreed to have everything shown tonight. She’s not ashamed of sex, not like some of the women I’ve coached. She’s just bored. Well, I’m about to take her on the ride of her life.

  “Do you like it when someone sucks your clit?” I ask, since she’s already forgotten I asked her a question.

  All I get is a moan.

  “You know what I think, Mia?” I ask, ready to dive in. There’s nothing I love more than a soaking wet pussy, and I know Mia’s going to taste great. I push her skirt up and hook my thumbs in her thong, yanking it down in one quick motion. “I think your partners just aren’t taking the time to pay attention to you. They’re thinking about themselves and what your body does to them, not about how they can make you feel. They aren’t paying attention to your cues and reactions, so they aren’t hitting the right buttons.”

  Mia spreads her legs wide, and the audience is practically vibrating with anticipation. “Show me, Jake. Please,” she begs. “Prove to me that I can still have good orgasms.”

  Good? Fuck that. She’s about to have an orgasm that blows her fucking mind. I’m going to show the entire world that I’m one hundred percent the real deal.

  With the audience cheering me on, I sink my lips into Mia’s hot, pink pussy, and her hips jerk up at the contact. I don’t hold back. I’m pulling out all my tricks this time. I don’t have my reputation for nothing. I’m not the host of A Cunning Linguist because I give satisfactory head. Nope. I’m without a doubt the best in the world.

  I lick and suck and flick and plunge my tongue into Mia’s dripping pussy, gripping her hips to hold her still because she’s bucking and writhing like a madwoman. Her cries get louder and louder until she’s screaming my name.

  And the cameras capture all of it. My head buried between her legs, her quaking body, her pussy that�
��s starting to pour rivers of cum all over my face.

  The audience is going fucking wild like I’ve never heard them before. Glancing up at Mia’s face, I see her eyes roll back in her head.

  See? What did I tell you?

  Then she gives one final scream—my name of course—and her body lifts up off the chair, then collapses.

  I lean back on my heels and wipe my mouth on the jacket of my ten-thousand-dollar suit.

  Mia just fucking passed out.

  I look at the camera and flash my cockiest grin. That will show all the doubters and haters.

  Next thing I know, Toby is running over to help revive Mia. When she looks up at me with awe in her eyes, and says, “You’ve restored my faith in the existence of orgasms,” I think for a second she’s about to declare me the fucking messiah of cunnilingus.

  The audience reaches a fever pitch, and I wink for the camera. Once again I’ve over delivered on the promise of a mind-blowing orgasm. I am, in fact, the Cunning Linguist.

  Jake

  “Dude,” Toby says, shaking his head in disbelief. “That was fucking insane.”

  I laugh as I settle down in my desk chair, unknotting my tie and throwing it across my office to land on top of the pussy-juice stained jacket that’s hanging over the arm of my buttery leather couch. This office is a total man cave. I spend a shit ton of time here, so I made sure my interior designer made it comfortable. It’s all dark woods and leather, dark gray walls. I even have a huge, heavy wooden bar imported from Germany off to the side with the most expensive distillations of scotch available.

  Kicking back in my chair, I prop my feet on the desk, crossing my feet at the ankles, and clasp my hands behind my head.

  “Fuck yeah, it was. Best episode to date. I dare those fuckers to question my skills now.”

  Toby pulls out a tablet and starts tapping away on the glass, no doubt ready to give me a breakdown of the show stats. We do this every night.

  “Man, the viewers loved it,” Toby says. “Fucking amazing. More people tuned in for this than any episode ever according to our analysts.”